Relationship Agreements, Rules, and Contracts by Polyamory PodKamalaDevi
Relationship agreements are important to keep a polyamory relationship running smoothly. Here is an actual contract written by the San Diego. Alt-columnist Mistress Matisse lists 20 dating-and-mating rules that poly couples of her Anyone may end an agreement unilaterally by leaving the relationship. Love ain't what it used to be. These days, the idea of embarking on an open relationship is becoming increasingly common for couples.
I choose to love, honor, and respect you. I will be as truthful and reliable as I can be. I will not agree to do things with you unless I truly want to, yet I will be respectful of, and sensitive to, your needs and feelings.
When I want something from you, I will ask clearly, not hint or expect you to read my mind.
I will not create expectations in my head concerning you or your actions then blame you for their unfulfillment. I will share my love, joy, and caring with you.
I will never use your words against you nor divulge your private thoughts and actions to others without your consent. I will communicate to you what "privacy" means to me, and I will accept your definition of "privacy" for you. Any actions or words that relate to something the two of us said or did together should be considered private unless we have discussed it and agreed to reveal our actions or thoughts to others.
I will care for you when you are sick or hurt even if it means you want me to do nothing at all for you. I will respect that, in most instances, you know what is best for you, and what you need from me. However, I will not let you purposefully hurt or destroy yourself without attempting to persuade you otherwise.
You may count on me for strength and emotional support when you are down and I expect the same of you. We are separate and unique individuals who choose to enrich and cherish each other. Ultimately, though, only I can choose to be happy or not, fulfilled or not. I am equal to you, not more nor less.
I will not compete with you and play "I win, you lose" games. I will enjoy your different qualities and work towards "win-win" situations. I feel proud of you and will not take you for granted. I will accept you as you are and not try to change those aspects of yourself I am uncomfortable with. I will endeavor to keep my mind open and my boundaries flexible. I will support your growth processes. I will not attack you in public or private when something occurs that I don't like.
I will instead accept it as a part of who you are and rationally discuss it with you in private in order to more fully understand who you are. I will remember your love and constancy and communicate this to you. I will not judge you against my past relationships, good or bad. Nor will I hold on to issues or grudges.
Rules of engagement for polyamory relationships
I will enjoy sharing hopes, dreams, and plans for the future with you now. Our time together has a high priority in my life. I value our time and will make conscious efforts to ensure we have as much time for each other as we need. I also recognize that we need separate and alone time, too. I will respect your right to be apart from me, and I expect you to respect my right to have alone time also.
I have friends and interests that are not in common with you; you also have friends and interests not in common with me. I will not be possessive or jealous of your time away from me, recognizing that the fulfillment and joy you receive benefits me as well. I will be open to uncommon experiences with you though. Our careers are also important to us and I will be understanding when job demands temporarily take a high priority in your life; I expect the same from you.
It's somewhat against my personal views, but I adhere to the rule because I like having The Puppy around. On the reverse end of that, one of my conditions with The Puppy is that anyone he dates has to understand that I'm part of the deal. They don't have to date me. Condoms, dental dams, and the like are better than any human wingman in those kinds of circumstances. The Puppy doesn't want children.
I'm on the fence. Some days I feel that I wouldn't mind being a mother. Getting pregnant by someone who wants to keep the resulting fetus would cause a serious problem.
Non-monogamy rises and falls on the back of communication, honesty, and trust. Without those, the network crumbles.
For the Puppy and I, this can be tricky because our boundaries go a bit further than others. Our friends like breasts.
Polyamory Commitment Page
I have big natural breasts. Sometimes he says that I check in for things that he really doesn't mind. He was off gaming with his best friends.
At one point during the night, an acquaintance that has seen me topless before asked if another friend also female and I would take off our tops and let him take a picture of us hugging.
Best Practices for Negotiating Polyamorous Relationship Agreements - bestwebdirectory.info
There were about five other people in the room. One of them was the host who has also seen me topless. I text messaged the Puppy.